Nothing has stretched my faith more than parenting, and this week I'm getting a really good stretching.
Yesterday I put my three boys on a bus heading to church camp in California - without their cell phones. This is good for them, but hard for a mom who is used to talking to her kids every day when we are apart. They will get home on Friday, but I won't be here, because I'll be in North Carolina at She Speaks. So that means a full week without seeing my boys.
Normally I wouldn't worry at all for their safety while at camp. But this is a new camp, and they have a beach day. I know this sounds like lots of fun to most people, but I view the ocean as a huge death trap. I never relax at the beach when my kids are in the waves, and am on constant guard, often walking up and down the shoreline like a one of those long-legged birds.
God has dealt with me about this fear because at its root is a lack of trust. Every time that fear starts in my belly and threatens to work its way up, I have to take a deep breath and declare again who I trust.
Obviously I don't trust myself for their safety - I'll be 3000 miles away and their dad is 350 miles away.
While I'm praying for alert and savvy adults to be around, I don't completely trust the counselors for their safety.
While I'm sure there are great lifeguards, I don't completely trust the lifeguards for their safety.
While I'm praying my kids will stay with a buddy, I don't trust other children for their safety.
But I do TRUST GOD WITH THEIR SAFETY! The truth is that only God can be where I can't.
You can be sure I'll be praying this week for my children's safety. But that's not my only prayer. Above all else, I'm praying that God will bring my boys to a new place in their own faiths. A place where they move from a "head" trust and faith, to a "heart" trust.
Come to think of it, that's what God's trying to do in me this week ... again.
I'll be leaving first thing Tuesday morning for She Speaks. I can't wait! If you think of it, please pray for my kids, and for all of the travel for those of us heading to North Carolina and especially for the She Speaks conference. I want God's presence to be felt in every space and for hearts to be touched.
In His love,