Getting Ready for Christmas

It's the day before Thanksgiving, and I have to admit, I'm thinking ahead. Oh yes, I'm going to fully enjoy the day tomorrow. I've been intentionally cultivating a heart of thankfulness this week. But I'm really ready for Christmas this year.

Just this past weekend I walked into my local Starbucks and felt a surge of joy. Not just because a gingerbread latte was waiting for me on the other side of the counter. But because I LOVE the promise it holds for the spirit of Christmas.

I've learned the season of Christmas is what I make it to be. I can choose to put Jesus first place in my life each and every day - or I can put Him somewhere down on my to-do list. The difference is huge.

The past several years have been very hectic for me. Two years ago I never got the Christmas tree decorated. It had lights ONLY because it was a pre-lit tree - but no decorations. There was lots I didn't get done that year, but the most painful admission to make is what else I missed. I missed the joy of Jesus' birthday. I missed the sweet presence of my Savior.

Never again!

This Christmas I've already made a list of priorities - and it isn't long. But it highlights the most important things to me this year. It's manageable and it's Christ-focused. I'm not one of those people who schedules every moment - but I've realized there is more peace and joy when I plan for the important things.

This weekend is a perfect time for you to do some prayerful prioritizing for the upcoming month. Consider what is most important to you and your family, and make a list. Then take your list and put it on a calendar. Make "appointments" that you don't want to miss!

If you are looking for some ways to bring more Jesus-focus to your Christmas, I'd love to recommend a resource my friend Marybeth Whalen wrote, called "A Recipe for Christmas Joy."

It is wonderful! She has filled it with the perfect balance of spiritual and practical components. For instance, she's included a week-by-week countdown, recipes and gift ideas. But she also has devotions on how to make Jesus the centerpiece of your holiday, how to be intentional and how to reach out to others.

I'm going to try one of her recipes tomorrow for Monkey Bread. It's oh so easy, and I know my family will love it. Then for Christmas morning, I'll be trying her breakfast casserole with grits, sausage and cheese. I'm also going to put together some of the food gifts she recommends. I'm particularly interested in one involving pretzels, Hershey's kisses and M&Ms. The kids will love helping me make those.

What I love about Marybeth's guide is that it's not all about formal lists and forms. It's about inviting the Maker of Joy into your heart and home at Christmas, and then sharing that Joy with others.

If you want to read more about it, visit Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Happy Thanksgiving ... and an early Merry Christmas!!

In His Love,

Glynnis

When a Woman is Lonely

Yesterday I wrote a post about how to help your child make friends. After reading the comments, I realized that most were from women who are experiencing loneliness. One woman asked me how I found friends, so I decided to share some more of my own experience during that lonely time.

First, let me say that I am in introvert by nature. I can play the extrovert role in certain situations (like She Speaks, or when I'm speaking somewhere). But by nature, I'm quiet. All I really need is a few good friends, and I'm content.

But when we moved, I didn't even have that. While I'm not shy at all, my tendency is to not invite myself into pre-existing groups. So one of the best things we did was to attend a church that was relatively new and growing. That way, there were very few groups already formed, and lots of women who had recently relocated just like me.

Then, I started attending a Bible study. At that time, my son Robbie was three. So I had to find a group where there was childcare. It was in that group that I found one of my closest friends.

I also made friends by volunteering. I love to tell the story of how I connected with Proverbs 31. Soon after we started attending our church, Lysa TerKeurst gave her testimony one Sunday. I didn't know who she was, but I was moved by her story. That very same week, I heard her on the radio talking about Proverbs 31 Ministries. Then I heard God tell me to call her and volunteer. Somehow I tracked her phone number down, and called her. I told her how I had just moved, had a degree in journalism and was wondering if she needed any volunteers. She paused and said, "We've been praying for someone with a degree in journalism."

Being obedient to God's gentle nudge changed my life and has given the best friends a woman can have. Even though most of them are extroverts, they've found a place in their hearts for me.

Finally, I tended to look for women who looked as lonely as me. I'm touched by Jesus' heart for those on the fringes of a group. I want to have a heart for those who feel left out too.

But most importantly, I prayed for a friend. And God answered, abundantly.

Even though God eventually provided me with friends, He also allowed me to go through a time where (other than my family) I had no one. During that time, He revealed Himself to me in new ways. Although I'd been a Christian all my life, I'd never really heard God speak directly to me. When I was lonely, I started hearing His voice in my spirit. God put scripture verses into my mind I didn't know I had memorized. It was an amazing time of renewal for me, and it continues to this day.

I think God had to strip all my self-dependency away for me to see how much I needed Him. And it took an extended time of loneliness for me to truly understand the depth of that need.

If you are lonely today, I invite you to lean into Jesus. Let Him know of the pain you are feeling and allow Him to fill you up. Grab a cup of coffee, go sit at your kitchen table and imagine Jesus sitting across from you. I promise you that your loneliness will ease.

In His Love,

Glynnis

Helping Kids Make Friends

A warm welcome to those of you who are visiting after reading my devotion entitled, "Making the Most of Loneliness." If you're like me, you feel every ounce of your child's pain. Sometimes it's hard for us to help our children because of that.

I can still remember the physical pain of loneliness when I moved 2000 miles away from all my friends and family. I definitely took friendships for granted after living in the same city all my life. I didn't realize how hard it was to find compatible friendships. But I'm a problem solver by nature, so it didn't take long for me to figure out ways to connect with others.

But our children don't often have those skills. And most children are bound up in playground hierarchies that make it even more difficult to navigate friendships. Once children are too old for their moms to set play dates, what are the options for helping?

There are things parents can do. I'm happy to share some of these tips today. If you like my practical approach to helping kids overcome issues, I hope you'll consider getting my book, "When Your Child is Hurting," available through Proverbs 31 Ministries, or on Amazon.

Here are just a few ideas to help your child deal with loneliness and make friends:

1. Pray with, and for, your child for God to bring a friend. This can be a faith-builder when children see God answer their prayers.

2. Work on conversation skills. Discuss the importance of being a good listener, and asking open-ended, follow-up questions. Role play how to ask questions, like:
What did you do this weekend?
What’s your favorite sport to play? Why?
What do you like best about school?
If you could give away $1000, what would you do with it?
If you could have dinner with one person, who would it be and why?

3. Be an inviter. Help your child plan a special event, and then encourage him or her to invite a friend. This can be done very easily and affordably. For instance, you could:
Bake and decorate Christmas cookies
Make a model airplane
Make home-made gift tags from used greeting cards
Play a game of Frisbee golf
Take a hike and have a picnic
Attend a church event

4. Invest in your child's interests. Some of my best friends have developed out of common interests. But finding and developing your child's interests is a learning process. It’s best to ease into new experiences. For example, take classes through your city recreation department before you invest $500 in sports equipment your child might not like in a month. When you do find something your child loves, then invest in that interest. Whether it's scouts, athletics, arts, music or dance, your child will immediately have a connection with other children in her class or team.

5. Introduce your child to Jesus as his best-friend. I wrote this in my devotion, but it bears repeating. Does your child have a Bible she can read? If not, this is a perfect time to buy one. Then your child can read for herself about our God who never leaves us alone, who is always near and who longs to be our friend. Learning to turn to the Bible is difficult times will be a source of life-long comfort.

I pray these ideas have sparked more for you. We can make a difference in our children's lives, and help prepare them for the future. Because there will always be times of loneliness.

In His Love,

Glynnis

A Different Dream for My Child

I've had a few times in my life, when a doctor's words have changed my future. The first was when at the age of 11 months, my oldest son Josh was put in glasses. I remember holding it together in the doctor's office and then sobbing all the way home.

The fears of the future overwhelmed me, with thoughts like: If he needs glasses now, will he eventually go blind? How will other children tease him? Will we be facing surgery because of his eye condition?

My heart broke for my precious baby boy and all that the doctor's diagnosis would mean for him in his life. Some of my fears did come true. Josh did need surgery at 18 months. He also wore a patch over one eye until he was 7 years old. And I'm sure some kids did tease him. And his bad vision did impact his ability to play sports.

But my 18-year-old son is happy, healthy and exploring other God-given gifts like music and studying to become a teacher. So once I got over the disappointment, I was able to move on to all other ways God would use my son.

Now I'm facing another doctor's diagnosis. This one is more life-altering. And I'm writing this today to remind myself that this diagnosis isn't a surprise to my God. He knew this was coming and he already has a plan to use my beautiful daughter Cathrine, and to create an amazing life for her.

Four years ago today, my two daughters stepped on American soil for the first time. Previously, their life in Liberia, Africa consisted of the most deprivation you can imagine. Never enough food, little protective oversight, no schooling, no books ... just a life of survival. (Cathrine is on the right)

When they joined our family, they blossomed like lovely roses. We saw them go from scared, emotionally frozen children, into confident, healthy, curious, laughing little girls.

Ruth, who was 8 when she arrived, took to learning like a sponge. She adores books and will often initiate learning about a specific subject. Although she is a few grades behind her biological age, it's a perfect fit for her developmentally. Within a year of extra help with language skills, Ruth was speaking clearly and in almost perfect English.

Cathrine arrived at age 10 (almost 11), and struggled with learning and language. Even with hundreds of hours of extra tutoring, she couldn't seem to grasp some basic concepts. She didn't grasp language either, and talks with a heavy accent in poor grammar. The education experts were confounded, and were certain the more time was needed for her to understand. They pointed to her background, and her deprivation, and explained away the poor test results. They gave her several IQ tests, and disregarded the results saying they didn't think they could get an accurate score because of all the extenuating circumstances.

That's when I started homeschooling her - certain that all she needed was consistent one-on-one help. But a month into it, I could see that something was wrong. She just didn't understand things.

So we had Cathrine tested by an educational psychologist, and have confirmed what my gut has been telling me for years. There is more ... and sadly it's not a learning disability we can address. Yesterday he told me my lovely, active, athletic, responsible, social daughter is mildly mentally retarded.

You would never know. Cathrine is conscientious, helpful, kind, thoughtful, funny, caring and loves her family and friends. But when you get a little closer, you see things that just don't click with her. Like when she asked if I will be her grandmother when I get older.

So now we face a new future. And just like I did 18 years ago, I'm struggling to keep the fear at bay.

But ... I've walked with my God long enough to not give in to that fear. Here's what I know today:

God has Cathrine in His hand, cradling, and lovingly protecting her.
God knew this was coming and hand-picked my husband and I to be her parents.
God will equip me to deal with this.
God has a future planned for Cathrine, and He will use her to do amazing things.

I am very thankful to finally have a diagnosis because now we can let go of some things and embrace others. And explore ways to help her develop into her full potential.

God's Word brings me much hope, and I can't help thinking about Jeremiah 29:11:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

A friend of mine wrote a book titled, "A Different Dream for My Child." That title really connects with me. I'm still dreaming for my daughter, only it's a different dream than I had yesterday morning.

If you'd like to hear more about our journey down this path, please post a comment and let me know. I struggle with this blog thing, and am never sure what people want to read. And of course, I would love your prayers.

If you are facing a diagnosis for a child you love, I want to recommend a great resource to you, written by a friend of mine, Jolene Philo. It's called "A Different Dream for My Child." It's a book of devotions to help parents when there child is facing a serious health condition. Click here to visit a website she has set up to help parents, and read more about the book.

In His Love,

Glynnis

What Seems Impossible to You Today?

What seems impossible to you today?

Is it achieving your dreams? Restoring a relationship? Finding a job? Getting married? Having children?

There's a lot we look at in life and thinks it's impossible for us. Maybe we think we are too old or too young. Too busy. Too sick. Too tired. Not smart enough. Not pretty enough. Not good enough. Not focused enough.

Today I want to encourage you to dream ... and then place that dream in the hands of the One who can make it POSSIBLE.

Matthew 19: 26 says, "Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'"

Every morning, when you get up, take your dream or problem and place it in the hands of God, saying: "Lord, today you know what I'm facing. You know my dreams. I can't do this alone. But You can. Please make this possible for me today."

Here's a quote that might encourage you too. It was sent to me by someone who read it on a sign in a sports store. I wish I could give the author proper credit.

Impossible.

Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier
to live in the world they've been given, than to explore the power they have to
change it.

Impossible is not a fact - it's an opinion.

Impossible is not a declaration - it's a dare.

Impossible is potential.

Impossible is temporary.

My prayer for you is that your "impossible" would turn into "possible." And that God would get all the glory when it does.

In His Love,

Glynnis

20th Anniversary of the Fall of the Berlin Wall

On Monday, November 9th, Germans will celebrate the day the Berlin Wall was ripped down - 20 years ago. I can still remember the television images of people with sledgehammers destroying the last evidence of communist oppression.

It was euphoria in Berlin that day, and for the days following. East and West Berliners freely stepped across the space that would have meant death just days before. In fact, from the time the wall was erected in 1961 to the time it was torn down, 136 people were killed just for trying to cross over.

Can you even image waking up to discover you couldn't leave your neighborhood? That's what it was like for those residents of West Berlin, August 13, 1961 (just one week before I was born).

This past June, my son Dylan and I walked the streets of Berlin with other high school students as we learned what life was like during those difficult years. It sure makes one appreciate the ability to travel across town to watch a soccer game or visit a friend.

Finally in 1989, freedom came to the people of Berlin.

2009 is a year of celebration, culminating on Monday, November 9th. In addition to ceremonies and concerts, at some point during the day, there will be a re-creation of the knocking down of the wall using painted "dominoes." Almost 1000 8' high sections of wall have been lined up and will be knocked down in a domino effect. Each one of these dominoes was painted by groups of youth. And I'm very happy to say that one of them was created by me and my son Dylan, along with other students from Glendale, AZ high schools.

I'll be watching national news, hoping to get a glimpse of this historic ceremony. But if I don't see it, it's nice to know that I had a small part in rejoicing with my German brothers and sisters.

To learn more about the Domino Project, click here.

Here's a photo. Not of our domino, but of a group of them.

It's a day to rejoice in freedom. But in the shadow of that celebration is the reality that there are still millions of people silently suffering injustice, persecution and slavery around the world. Please join me in praying for those brothers and sisters.

Even in the depth of oppression, we can still taste freedom though Jesus Christ. No matter what the world can do to our bodies, no one can touch our spirits. Here are some promises:

John 8:36, "So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."

John 8: 31-32, "To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

Romans 6:22-23, "But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord."

1 Corinthians 2:12, "We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us."

November 9th is a day to remember the freedom that came to west Berliners. And every day is a day to remember the freedom that comes from Jesus.

In His Love,
Glynnis

My biggest spiritual challenge

I've just come home from one of my biggest joys and biggest spiritual challenges - worship team practice.

It's a joy because I love to worship God, and I've always loved to sing. Growing up, I was that little girl in her bedroom, singing dramatically with the hairbrush, dreaming of the day when my favorite band would invite me up as a guest lead singer.

From a very early age, I sang in school choruses, church choirs and a short stint in a Christian band in the early 80s. (Our one "tour" consisted of singing in Presbyterian churches in northern Arizona and the California coast).

Yet singing has also been a source of spiritual challenge, because it's been in worship where God has revealed most of my pride issues. You see, there is always a danger when you are on a stage of any kind to start to think that you've got it all together. In fact, you can easily start to think that if only people would listen to you, things could really flow more smoothly. And that you really could (and should) be selected to sing in this program, and given that solo, and so on.

In hindsight, I can see God was starting to split open my heart and reveal my pride, when 11 years ago when we moved to Charlotte, and He clearly told me to not sing. In fact, He told me to not tell anyone I could sing. I didn't listen. I let it "slip out" one day in a Bible study, and that led to an opportunity to help lead worship at an event. The leader of that event sensed my pride issues coming to the surface, and I was "relieved" of that role with the explanation that they would be using someone on the worship team.

In spite of the embarrassment, something amazing happened when I wasn't leading worship. I learned to actually worship. When I wasn't worried about how I sounded, or hitting the right note, or singing the right words, I just relaxed and focused on God. It was in my humility that I sought God as I never had before.

It was six years before God released me to be back on the worship team. And to be honest, it is still a place where I continue to lay down my pride and submit in humility. Years ago I asked God to do whatever it took to remove pride from my life, and He is faithful. But I will confess, it is often difficult, uncomfortable and sometimes embarrassing.

Like the time I was asked to sing a solo at a women's retreat, and the accompaniment CD stopped after the first verse. Just stopped. The sound team restarted it, I started singing and it stopped again. So we started again, and finally I was able to finish the song. No one could understand what happened to the CD. I just smiled because I was pretty sure I knew Who stopped the CD.

My voice has changed over the years, and I will probably never get another solo. I may be one of the oldest back up singers on the team. And I will occasionally sing a wrong word or hit a wrong note. But my hands will be raised in praise, and I'll sing at the top of my voice out of love for my Savior.

I know the day will come when I won't be on the team, and some young girl will take my place. And I will still be worshipping God, and thanking Him for not letting me stay in the place I once was.

In His Love,

Glynnis

P.S. If you've visited today from reading my Encouragement for Today devotion, entitled "I Would Have Made a Great Pharisee" I bid you welcome. If you haven't seen it, please hop over to the P31 site and give it a read.